I’m glad the rodent is amused by his own confusing musings, as he sits hunchbacked and indolently like a coiled viper before his audience of adoring fans. I wonder how much they paid to hear this nonsense?

He makes weird rodent noises and gesticulations that make me want to throw confetti, perhaps a couple handfuls of bird seed at him.

The world is not here to awaken anything because evolution is not a fact. The world is unconscious and insentient. We are a product of a divine descent from celestial forms, not an ascent from the primordial slime.

The purposes of life are varied but the chief aim is to know, love and serve God. The real God, not the impersonal forces of the universe, evolutionary impulses and New Age ideologies masquerading as enlightenment.

If I stick my hand on a hot oven the pain is physical and neurological, not psychological.

This man is a fountainhead of confusion and pseudo-spiritual rodentry. His beady eyes gleam with con-artistry and a deceptive twinkle, wryly, like he’s getting over on you.

Ecce Rodenta! (Behold the Rodent!)